The topic of this article is playgroups: when to look for one, how to select the right one, and how to make sure your child gets the most out of the playgroup.
What is the “Playgroup Age”?
Children from two years old and up have a need to socialize. At this age, the children learn a lot from their peers. This social need can be filled in different ways, including through interacting with siblings, through visits to the park, or through round-robin playgroup arrangements. Alternatively, the mother can enroll the child in a playgroup. At this age, many groups meet three or four days a week, for three hours at a time.
When children spend time with each other, they spread germs. Children who go to playgroup are more likely to get sick than those who are isolated at home. On the other hand, a child who has older siblings in school is already exposed to germs from the outside. A parent with a first born should discuss with the child’s doctor the pros and cons of enrolling in a playgroup. Making such a decision requires a knowledge of the general health and social development of the individual child.
Three-year-olds have a greater need for a playgroup. They want to learn, and they are ready to learn. Three and half to four hours a day is ideal for them. Most playgroups for three year olds expect that the children are toilet trained. Different playgroups have different tolerances for handling accidents, or helping with the toilet training. Nursery programs at schools on the other hand, generally expect the child to be completely toilet trained.
Finding a Playgroup
There are more than thirty playgroups in our community. However, since the demand is great, one should start looking a year in advance, immediately after Sukkos the year before the child starts. While some playgroups advertise, typically, mothers network with neighbors and friends to find a group.
What to Look For in a Playgroup
The most important “component” of a playgroup is the Morah. Parents should look for Morahs who are warm, caring, enthusiastic, and intuitive. Morahs do not need a degree in education. “Old hands”, experienced mothers make great Morahs; so do fresh, young, anxious-to-please “youngsters”. However, if the child is a “handful”, a more experienced Morah may be more adept at handling him or her.
The physical environment of the playgroup should be safe, clean, bright, and equipped with good toys. Quality is more important here than quantity. Some of the essentials include a lego collection (size should be age appropriate), a play kitchen, and some form of train/car track.
Parents should find out in advance the adult/child ratio of the playgroup. This varies from group to group. Usually, if there is an assistant, the group is much larger. Children who need extra attention should be placed in a smaller group.
The daily routine of a playgroup should include circle time, an art project, and especially, free play. Circle time is when the children sit down, daven and learn a lesson. Physical activity should also be part of the day. This may be outdoor play when the weather allows it, or a structured physical activity indoors. The most important part of the curriculum is the social one—teaching the children how to interact with each other and with the Morah. There is no need to “push” a maximum of “learning” into the pre-schoolers. Art projects should be simple, so that the children can complete them on their own. Coloring and cutting with scissors are the important skills that the children should begin to master at this age.
While most playgroups take place in the morning, there are a few afternoon programs. Either time is equally beneficial to the child, as long as it fits with the child’s sleeping schedule.
Borderline Children
Sometimes, a Morah can sense that the child is having trouble functioning in the playgroup setting. The Morah may be able to identify undiagnosed special needs. It is best for the child if the parents take the Morah’s concerns seriously. On the other hand, sometimes, a Morah over-reacts to a challenging child. In these kinds of situation, it is best to have the child evaluated by a professional in order to receive a second opinion. Many times, evaluations may be received from the public school system free of charge.
Children with Special Needs
Most playgroups are not equipped to handle children with special needs. Usually, these children require speech, physical, and/or occupational therapy, and these might be best provided in a public pre-school. Parents must discuss with their Rav how to place their special needs child. The parents should keep in mind that early intervention is the most effective intervention, and that exposure to public school is less harmful when the child is young.
Some pre-school special needs children might be able to attend one of the local Yeshiva classes on a regular basis with a shadow. Fridays, which include Parsha and Shabbos party, are a good opportunity for a special needs child to join a Yeshiva pre-school. This would need to be negotiated with the Yeshiva on a case by case basis.